lover...

lover, n.

oh, how i hated this word. so pretentious, like it was always being translated from the french. the tint and taint of illicit, illegitimate affections. 
dictionary meaning: a person having a love affair.
impermanent. unfamilial. inextricably linked to sex.
i have never wanted a lover. in order to have a lover, i must go back to the root of the word. for i have never wanted a lover, but i have always wanted to love, and to be loved.
there is no word for the recipient of love. there is only a word for the giver. there is the assumption that lovers come in pairs.
when i say, be my lover, i don't mean, lets have an affair.
i don't mean, sleep with me. i don't mean, be my secret.
i want us to go back down to that root.
i want you to be the one who loves me.
i want to be the one who loves you.