lost and insecure...

I hate when he goes on his little finding himself/shut the world out sprees. There’s never a warning. Its just a normal conversation, then bam I don’t hear from him. He doesn’t realize that when he does that it tortures me. I start over thinking. Is it something I did? Is it something I said? How can I fix it? Why is he doing this? Then he starts talking again. Pops back up like nothing ever happened.  When he’s gone in that brief little time,  I am miserable. I’m lost without him. I just go around like a lost puppy. I hear trucks that sound like his. See trucks that look like his. I hear him. Everywhere. He tortures me. I can’t sleep without him. I toss and turn. Stare at my phone.
Ughhhhhhhhh. I hate it.